This is what I wrote in my journal today. I thought I’d share it; along with a couple of other reflections:
“This is a happy moment. I’m sitting by the side of the road eating a roll I’ve made from things that I bought this morning. There is a strong wind in my face and sun on my back and I’m watching cars fly by. There are mountains in the distance.
At least it was a happy moment before I decide to write it down. Haha, that’s a lie. I’m still happy. I enjoy writing, and I enjoy the voice inside my-self that likes to narrate an experience, that likes to tell a story, that wants to share.
This definitely is happiness – I’ve found it. It lives inside of me and it is about feeling free, being present, and grateful for everything that has led up to the moment I am now in.
And then I start to worry that this is the kind of happiness a person experiences just before they die.
The emotions – they shift, they turn, they twist, they tease – and I just watch”
Today was a harmonious day in my life. There I was cutting through the countryside on my bike in a land I don’t know so well. Such simplicity. I’ve been holding a lot of tension for the last weeks, months, all my life even, and it is only now that the tension has been released that I can truly see it. Of course it’ll probably come back, but then so will the joy, the happiness, the awareness.
A longer post will come soon – probably called something like “Happiness in Spain” and will be less personal. Thank you for hearing me on this one.